Random Thoughts and Feelings

Okay, so I haven't been in the blogging world in a while. Why? Not sure. I stopped the frequency when I was suffering with morning/night/all day sickness with this baby, and just haven't gotten back into the groove. Maybe I'm just tired and cranky....not sure!

So, I'm sure I have about zero readers right now, but that's okay. I felt the urge to right down some thoughts.

I'm pregnant with our 3rd and last baby.

I'm excited to have her in my life, and for this to be the one to complete our family. I loathe most of pregnancy, I can't lie, but as I feel her moving around in my belly, I'm getting a little nostalgic and wanting to make sure I remember this feeling forever, as the next few weeks will be the last time I feel this. I have such negative thoughts about my body while I'm pregnant, but lately, I've been looking in the mirror and trying to cherish this body that I have right at this moment b/c of the miracle it is performing and realizing that it really is beautiful. I only have a few more weeks until she arrives, and I'm nervous, scared, excited, anxious, tired, giddy, hesitant and a whole slew of emotions with it. I know that I want this to be our last baby, so it's not me mourning that this is our last child, it's just me wanting to remember. Remember Kate, remember! I know I won't, though. I know it as well as I know my own name. I won't remember the details of exactly how I felt and looked while pregnant. It's frustrating.

I feel so blessed to have this opportunity for 3 times in my life. I feel inexplicably unprepared to have 3 children.....and even though I'll have had approximately 10 months to prepare.....you're never quite prepared.

I am feeling a tinge of regret that I haven't cherished this pregnancy. With two other children, this pregnancy has seem to go by almost unnoticed except when I go to get dressed in the morning and have to pull on maternity clothes. I am going to consciously try and make an effort to focus, at least once a day, on this new little life inside me, while she is still inside me.

And, no, we still haven't settled on a name. Our favorite right now is Rylan. Sydney is insisting that we name her Lexi, though, and always calls her that.

So, on to other things.....

I'm thinking of this b/c Addyson is yelling at me from her room right now trying to delay her nap.

Ways Addyson tries to get out of taking her nap:

"Mommy I stinky"

"Mommy I have boogies"

"Mommy Potty!!" (which she never ends up going)

"Mommy I awake!"

"Mommy I need you!"

"Mommy my clothes off!" (that means she's stripped naked)

"Mommy I need to be princess!"

Ways Sydney delays me going out of her room at bedtime:

"Mom, I have to tell you something important.....ummmmm....."

"Mom, I'm really thirsty"

"Mom, can we talk about Jesus?"....this one gets me all the time...I just can't say no to this!

"Mom, what are we doing tomorrow? and the tomorrow after that? and the tomorrow after that? It's really important that I know".

"Mom, just one more song? please? you sing so pretty."

"I have a secret I have to tell you and you can't tell any of your friends." (then she proceeds to whisper nothing in my ear....just heavy breathing and saying...uhhhhh).

"Mom will you count my webkinz and make sure they are all in my bed" (the answer to this is always, no, b/c she has 21 freakin' webkinz!)

Cute Sayings the girls have said lately:

Addyson: "White Horse, I ride it, really, I did!" (she says this whenever she sees a horse - which is every day - about when she rode a white pony over Christmas).

Sydney: "Those aren't circles under my eyes, mom, they're semi-circles."

Syd: "Mom, when we go to live with Jesus after we die, will we be able to play with the whales?"